Hacks for the win!
Here are some single mom dating hacks for the win! Whether you’ve never dated a single mom, into one of our kind and absolutely clueless because you haven’t procreated yet or you are the single mom new-ish on the dating scene post mini-me and researching. Please read on.
Admittedly, when I realized I was going to be raising my daughter alone I foresaw a future where I was single forever. I thought my dating life was inevitably over.
Some of you may remember my initial post about this here. I assumed no one would want to be with someone with such a busy life. And even if they did, I lacked the time management skills necessary to juggle it all.
Oh the naivity!
She’s six now and while I’m still a work in progress, it’s turned out to be quite the opposite in so many miraculous and surprising ways.
The conclusion being a collaborative effort between choices and intention that led to this person I am today as a pretty kick-ass mother.
Which brings me to point numero uno.
We choose wisely.
Everything is a choice. When we say yes to one thing we are invariably saying no to something else. As a mom, time is of the essence. Hence, I am selective about how I allocate my time.
Time is something we can’t get back once it’s gone and there isn’t a lot of it left over once my laundry list of responsibilities have been checked off. So if the person cannot respect my time from the jump, I dead it.
We aren’t needy.
Remember that laundry list I mentioned above? There’s also a business to run and a child to tend to. I also have a self-care regimen that lacks like a you-know-what these days. Which means I don’t need your every thought on me and wouldn’t have the time if I did.
Experience tells me this tends to attract the types that want a mommy. My advice is RUN. But if your date is that whole person that can appreciate a whole and busy woman and not be threatened by it, then you have my blessing.
Remember the differences.
It’s easy for me to blow off my childless friends’ and romantic interest’s feelings when they say they’re tired or complain about something in their life I wish I could do so easily. I mean, don’t they know how tired I am and how much coordinating it would take to be able to do something so simple?!
“Woosah Kris”, remember they don’t get it. It’s important to have patience and compassion for the relationships that mean something to me.
Likewise, a partner and people in my life that are going to add to my life with companionship to balance out what is so utterly draining most times being both parents-would be nice.
We get to choose AGAIN.
Whether you’re looking for a fling, the ring or just a dating thing, we can do what we wilt. We’ve been there and done that and the balls in our court to define our lives and our relationships however we want.
Which has always been the case, but there’s something extra empowering about giving birth and preserving the species that makes that choice a little more bold in life.
This stream will certainly continue evolving as I do in the matter of dating with a mini-me.
I’d love to hear from you and what your insights and experiences have been in the comments below!
I’m hearing all that sweety.I’d love to comment more but I gotta go play mommy and daddy.There’s laundry to do and dishes to clean and it’s summertime so you know how that is……plus when your child has things going on also like camps and classes and auditions…..I’d be lucky to get a coffee date….forget about a fling a ring or a dating thing…there’s no time.That was a great read sweety.Love your stuff.I may not be a female but I hear ya sister.
Touche Jim! It’s nice to know I’m not alone in this! Keep me posted!